Temporal Wash

Posted on Tue 20 December 2016 in Writing

Michael put the laundry in the washing machine, set the heat and cool-down settings his wife liked and pushed start. Ding! It was done.

Two weeks ago M had purchased the new laundry set. It was a stackable unit that took up less space than their previous duo. He and his wife liked it, as it freed up space for dishwasher that they had their eye on. That was the next purchase on the list

The dishwasher, like the washer dryer combo they recently purchased, came with a new temporal speed option. It was the latest in the line of time altering technology. It enabled cleaning to be done instantly. The only chore that remained was to load and unload the machines. The higher-end models would do that kind of busy work for you.

No one knew what the side effect of doing all this cleaning in the past had. Did washers and dryers magically appear and disappear after 60 minutes of doing their work in the past? Who knows. There might be some perplexed Romans out then, but the historians had assured us that nothing unusual had shown up in the history books. That and no one had found a gladiator outfit in their washer after the cycle was done. So maybe there was nothing to worry about.

Every once in a while, however, a temporal wash would fail. A repairman was called and it was all sorted. Over the years this began to happen more and more. Many machines were failing all over M's home town and no one knew why. At last the company issued a statement.

Dear temporal wash users, the temporal brand does not use time as a means of saving time. Instead we use tried-and-tested beaming technology to move washes from one machine to another. It was determined early on that many machines remain idle for extended periods of time. Our patented technology takes advantage of these idle cycle and washes your dirties in other people's machines. We apologize for the confusion.